Words of warning from the Borkowski poet in residence to anyone not wishing to make the same mistakes as Paul McCartney, Britney Spears or Robbie Williams, all of whom have mistaken brief, random bliss for something lasting or satisfying. Bliss is short-lived a sun spot on a star’s eye a gutter-pressed candle stuttering out but…
Is it a coincidence that the verdict and sentencing to death of Saddam Hussein have arrived two days before the pivotal U.S. Congressional Elections? The Borkowski poet in residence wonders what George W. Bush might be thinking… Well we got him, he’s going. Saddam’s been shown the door I hope that you won’t think about…
Paris Hilton apparently wants to be the first celebrity to go into space. The hotel heiress plans to take her reality TV show The Simple Life into orbit and have cameras filming her as she trains to be the first celebrity astronaut. The Borkowski poet in residence imagines how she might react… You only get…
Kate Winslet will “knife” anyone who calls her a bad mother. The actress, who has a five-year-old daughter Mia and two-year-old son Joe, has warned people never to question her parenting skills. “People can throw anything they want at me, and be as mean as they like. But don’t mess with me as a mother,…
A celebrity-driven Halloween fantasy by the Borkowski poet in residence. A loopy young celeb called Tom Cruise surfed sofas in search of his muse. He found her consuming a reporter called Blooming in search of some headline news. It was of course Halloween and Tom had been a year off the screen after the Paramount…
Brit artist Damien Hirst has been accused of plagiarizing a design by Robert Dixon. The Borkowski poet in residence has suffered similar difficulties… “The problem is not Damian Hirst’s borrowing from others, but his own loss of originality,” Jonathan Jones, The Guardian, Wednesday October 25 This poem has been copied by Damien Hirst. It’s been…
Sir Paul McCartney has furiously refuted allegations by his estranged wife Heather Mills that he was physically abusive towards her. The former Beatle is furious over the claims made by Heather in leaked divorce documents, and has vowed to “vigorously” contest the allegations in court. What we really want to know is that money got…
“Whatever Madonna’s original motives were for adopting 13 month old David Banda, from the mission run Home of Hope orphanage in Malawi, are now irrelevant. The backlash has suffocated the original motivation.” The baby in the basket the mother in the press the father back in Africa the balance to redress. The baby in the…
The Madness of Boy George, a documentary following the mercurial ex-front man of Culture Club through his period of community service for drug-related offences, airs on Channel 4 tonight. The Borkowski poet in residence marks the occasion with a poem… Chameleon boy is happy and sad a twisted, curmudgeonly acid-mouthed cad or joyful and spirited,…
The career resurrection of David Hasselhoff continues apace, with last Friday even being declared Hoff Day by Radio 1 DJ Chris Moyles. The Borkowski poet in residence just had to join in with the celebrations… He’s a happy cheeseball icon, he’s a kosher brand of ham. He’ll keep you watching for ten minutes ‘til the…